Loose says “Yes,”
Tight says “No.”
Loose says “Take it,”
Tight says “Take Nothing.”
Loose is good,
Tight bad;
One is Liberal,
The other Conservative,
One kind-hearted
the other miserly.
So different
Yet the same,
Two forms of
no opening,
no conversation,
no exploration
no possibility.
The power choice lies in
Neither yes nor no,
Neither giving nor withholding.
Power comes from
seeing the possibility for you
in this tense moment:
It’s clear what they want;
Now,
Take a deep breath
Get clear
how can you leverage this moment
for your purposes?
That "take a deep breath" thing is so important to figure this out, I think, and we can give ourselves permission to do it. There's no rule that says you have to answer, engage, react immediately. This might sound silly, but I sometimes look out the window for five seconds when I'm in a conversation so that I can fully take in the situation, then speak. It does feel somewhat strange to me at times, but I also notice myself participating with a more open and thoughtful perspective. Odd, isn't it?
Posted by: tilly pick | April 24, 2012 at 10:28 PM
Thanks, Tilly. That moment of "looking out the window" just might make it possible to shift from seeing that request or demand as a problem for you to seeing it as an opportunity.
Posted by: Barry | April 25, 2012 at 08:27 AM